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July 18 My Boy Alex...Hi all.
Some of you know ad some of you don't know I have a boy called Alex and that I am having great problems right now. He is a very intelligent boy who loves music and art, PE and anything sporty. He is compassionate, caring and loves his baby brother and sister, almost like his own children. I just wished I could see this more than what I get right now.
I wrote about Sophie a few weeks ago, so I thought, keep tradition and do the next one!
I was working in H.Samuels when I fell pregnant with Alex. I had been in a relationship of sorts with his dad (of which I shan't be naming) for a few months, but it did come as a shock. I had been using the 3 monthly injection and we had been taking further precautions too. Still I was here, sitting in the doctors room going through the same emotions that I'd been through 2 and a half years earlier. My first thought however this time was, 'how will I tell him?' I knew that the relationship we had wasn't serious, just a bit of fun. He wasn't the type of person that I could see heading down the aisle with in the near or distant future. I hadn't even really introduced him to Sophie properly at the time, though she had met him a few times. (I know I sound a slapper, but we had been seeing each other for about 6 months) Anyway, I knew I would have to get the inevitable over and done with, so I told my mum who was the 'see, I told you so' type. I had such a lecture. But now she knew, I asked her to tell him for me. Which she gladly did!
We had agreed to meet up at my home where we could discuss what we were going to do. As I had already decided that this baby was for keeps, I really needed to know where he would be fitting in to all of this. I didn't want the world, just to know if he would be playing a part in the baby's life. After much discussion, tears and a small argument, we were still nowhere closer to any resolution so I decided to make the descision to keep him away. I didn't want my child to have a sporadic relationship, never knowing when and if his dad was going to turn up.
So here I was, 20 and pregnant and alone. Again. All I had was me, my Sophie and this knew little life groing inside me. I knew I was completely out of my mind with worry but I did what every Brit does, get on with things. Though, just before Christmas 2000, I finally gave up working as I was very tired coping as a pregnant mum with little help from anyone.
Alex was a fab pregnancy, I was huge with him! From behind, I didn't look pregnant, but as I turned round, this enormous globe would attack you! Many a time Sophie would get knocked over by her babba as she called my bump, but she loved it nevertherless.
My due date, May 21st came and went, with absoultely no sign of this baby! So me and my best friend Kim decided to go out for the day to the towns Kite Festival. That was on June 3rd. Late that evening, I didn't feel right, so i called on my neighbour and close friend Claire. We were that close that I had asked her to be at the birth as my mum had told me she didn't want to be there again. (I later found out she didn't mean it, but we were both too stubborn to sort things!) Sophie and me stayed with Claire and Phil that night and had a bit of a laugh. We were wondering if it was goin to happen anytime soon. Early in the morning, I started having the familiar pains that I remembered with Sophie. So Claires partner took us to the hospital where at just gone 6 that evening of June 4th 2001, Alex-James arrived. The Simpsons had just started and I was nearly tempted to call him Bart!! He weighed 9lb 8, 2lbs heavier than his sister. Claire cut the cord for me and now here I was, again not knowing how the hell I was going to cope.
Alex and me came home the following day to a very grumpy Sophie. It turned out she was very happy being the only child, and it was insulting to think she had a brother! I don't know why, but I remember looking at this gorgeous new baby boy thinking, 'you're gonna be trouble'. I wish I'd been wrong.
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Over the next 18 months, PND crept back in my life and it was difficult. I'd managed to fall out with most of my neighbours through one thing or another and again I was feeling very alone, but again, I got sorted after a visit to the doctor. But this time, it was hard. Not on my behalf, but I had noticed Alex was a very active baby. As in, he was walking early, never sleeping and NEVER listening. I thought he'd grow out of it, but he never.
When he started school, I finally decided to see a proffessional about him. I knew that the behavior wasn't like other kids, most other kids did behave, even if they didn't at home, they would at school or whatever. After a lot of assessments, he had been diagnosed with 'signs of ADHD' and 'signs of Aspgers'. Thing is with a (non)diagnosis, there is no help. All I had was a leaflet for a parenting course and a list of support lines.
3 years down the line, things are much much worse. It used to just be hyperactiveness, no sleep, things like that. But now, it's escalated to the point of that I am sometimes scared of my beautiful boy. In the last 18 months, we've had him threatening to kill himself, wishing he could stab me (he once got a knife out of the kitchen). He's erratic, doesn't sit still, doesn't concentrate well and hits out at me and others all the time. He continually steals from us and others and has lost a lot of his friends as a result.
I have been to countless courses, doing countless reward charts, time outs, pocket money etc. But if Sophie knows how to behave normally without incentive, why can't Alex? That's if these things work at all! I start positive every day. But it takes just one thing to not go Alex's way and all hell breaks loose.
Like this morning for instance. Him and Rhys were playing with one of those rope lights and they were having a fab time. I had asked, then told Alex he mustn't show Rhys how the plug goes in the socket because Rhys could hurt himself. Then I had to warn him if he did it again, he'd lose out on playing on his Ds and the Wii later. Not even 5 minutes later he was doing it again. so I said he'd lose them. With that, he threw the rope light at me (I was feeding Bethan the 3 month old) and he went to hit me. Then he started smashing up the lounge and just kicking off.
There's only so much I can do now and only so much more I can take. I love this boy so very much, and I want him to be happy. Thankfully, we are waiting for a reassessment. Alex will also be getting counselling in September and we will be getting some home help 3 hours a week so Alex and I can rebuild our relationship. I'll let you know how we get on
xx July 01 Can't Believe I've Been a Mum For Over 11 Years....... Hi everyone, it is a bit of a memory lane visit here, so bear with me!!
I have been a mum for 11 years, 3 months and 7 days, not that I'm counting! My litle girl is on her way to secondary school for the next phase of her education in September. I'm not even 30 yet! She's still tiny, and by tiny, she's still able to wear some 3-4yr tops! She's just 122cm tall, but my word she has the atitude of ant teen!
Way back when I was 17 and just given birth to my baby girl Sophie did I ever think that there'd be 4. I never thought I'd be having one baby for goodness sake! When I had fallen pregnant, it had been a bit of a shock. At 16, I was on the pill, but I was naive and never thought to read the leaflets that accompany medications such as antibiotics. My GP had neglected to tell me either, thinking that I was still a kid. Still, now it had happened, I knew that there was no alternative in my mind, I was keeping this baby. Sophie's dad and I split up during the pregnancy, amicably enough, but he played no part in the rest of the pregnancy or the birth. I was pretty much alone, apart from an overbearing mother. Still, I gave birth to Sophie Louise and I got on with it.
It was tough. I knew it would be, but I didn't expect the dark feelings and the resentment I sometimes felt to this beautiful little baby I had produced. I always loved her and always will. But at the time I was in a scary place called Postnatal Depression. I didn't know about this, nor did I think I was ill. I thought I wasn't normal so I did my best to make out I was 'normal'. More and more I would not open the curtains, not bother to get out of bed even, I'd only just manage to egt out of bed to keep Sophie fed and clean. I didn't care about myself, I didn't't want to do this 'mum' thing anymore. I felt dead inside. Even her smile had not had it's effect on me. The only time we did venture out or clean was when my mother wanted us to visit or we went to hers.
Sophie was 15 months when Social Services knocked on the door. It was a wet, miserable Tuesday afternoon and I was getting ready to see the doctor as I had a chest infection. There was the social worker and a child protection officer adn they asked to speak to me. I answered all their questions truthfully. It was just then thtat it had clicked that I was actually ill. The social worker who had seen me suggested that I also speak to the GP about how I was feeling. I was so scared they were going to take Sophie away from me, but they never. In fact they did all they could to help me cope better with things.
Eventually, the medication kicked in and I was able to enjoy my little girl again. I even decided that I wanted to go to work for the first time. I managed to get a lovely job selling in the retail chain H.Samuel in January 2000. Itwas a new millenium, new start kinda thing. I loved that job! I found that chatting the hind legs off a donkey was a good sales technique and more often than not, I could make a sale 20% higher than the person originally wanted to spend. I'll never forget one sale I had. It was this lovely guy in his twenties who wanted to buy his beloved a platinum solitaire. He wanted something simple but elegant. His original budget was £500. After an hour of looking at rings, he still couldn't decide. He asked me what I would want, if money was no object, so I joked somethin from Tiffany's! But as I wanted a sale, I showed him a new ring that we only had in a week, It was a beautiful princess cut solitaire ring selling at £950. It was beautiful in my eyes. I said that I thought it was beautiful. Anyway, he left, and I was miffed. But 20 minutes he'd come back, with cash and brought it there and then!!! This couple are still together now, married and a baby on the way!
I left the job I loved in the November of that year as I was ill with my new pregnancy. But that's a story for another day.....
Thanks for reading, I'm gonna do some more of these over the next few weeks. Please feel free to comment!!
Trina xxx June 22 Well Here I am Again!Well Hi one and all,
I am officially back on Spaces!
I just wrote a blog about the birth of Bethan, feel free to have a read! If you're wondering where I have been, I shall explain. If you couldn't care less, tough, why are you still reading?! lol
Basically, I think the last time I blogged was last Sep/Oct. I'd just found out I was pregnant again, soon after Rhys. The pregnancy was making me really tired and I just didn't have the brain capacity to write a blog. I just managed my facebooking as I used my mobile phone the majority of the time!
In November, Marv and I decided we finally had to move from Basingstoke. I'd had enough with the family quarrels and being in between the local pub and shop. It was getting me down, we had no privacy and the kids weren't safe playing out. I just wanted to have a better opportunity for them to what I had as a kid. The opportunity arised for us to move to a small village near the Newbury. We jumped at the chance! After Christmas, we decided to move as soon as we could. After sorting out the paper work,we agreed that the beginning of Feb would be the best sort of time as it would give me time to sort out the maternity car for the rest of my pregnancy. Little did we know the weekend we were moving, it decided to have a flippin snowstorm!!
We went ahead, despite the atrocious weather. Due to me being heavily pregnant by now, it was decided that I would go to a friends for the day with the kids and let the men sort everything out. I am so glad I had done, even when I arrived at my new home, I could see there was so much still left to do!
That was nearly 5 months ago now! We are all settled in and the kids go to a village school, in the next village, and we have already made one or 2 really good friends. My family have realised that although I am no longer in Basingstoke, I do still care about them, I just wont be getting involved in the petty squabbles anymore, At the beginning, I never thought they'd be speaking to us again as they were totally against the move, said we were abandoning them, that we didn't care, etc. They can now see why we moved. As it turns out, just last week there was 3 stabbings at the local pub I used to live next to.
The only sad thing that has happened since I moved are to do with my two cats, Bailey and Marmite. A month after we moved in, he refused to enter our house anymore (still don't know for sure why) and he now lives next door with her other 7 cats. Then 3 weeks ago, I put Bailey out for the eveing and that's the last we've seen of her. She has never gone missing in the 4 years she's been alive, and it doesn't look so good :(
I'll be back in the next few days or so with some new pictures, but in the mean time, most fo you guys can see the pics on my Facebook, where they are regualrly uploaded!
Please pop in and say hi to me!
Love to all.
Trina xxx The Birth Of Baby Bethan 25/04/2009I finally had my little girl on 25th April! The week preceding the big event was very hard for me. Over the course of the week, I'd been getting pains, but nothing had happened. Finally, late on Friday April 25th, the pains I were getting were proper labour pains. But of course, now, I didn't believe it was happening. So I ignored it and went to bed to watch telly. when I realised these pains were regular, I decided to call the maternity unit and they said don't come til they are less than 10 minutes apart. I decided at 1:30am that it was time to leave as being 15 miles from the hospital and the my sisters (she was looking after the older 3 for me) I was worried that I'd be giving birth next to the A339! We arrived at the maternity unit at 2:30am, at which point everything stopped again!! The midwife suggested we go for a short walk, but I was determined to do a tour of the whole hospital! We (Marv & I!!) walked down 4 flights of stairs which at that point I should have turned round and gone back, and carried on down the very long corridor that leads to the main hospital. I decided that I needed to go back as things actually hurt now!! We eventually managed to get back to my room at 4am. I was now in a lot of pain and demanded my gas and air. I wanted to do the rest of the labour on my front as the pain wasn't so bad. All the time though, I was shouting at the midwife as I didn't think my waters would naturally break! I was demanding a c-section and the midwife just ignored my complaining and said they'd break when they were ready. And boy did I realise! I needed to start pushing, but they still hadn't broken so by now I was freaking out! But, all of a sudden I knew they'd broken! Two minutes, yes TWO minutes later, Bethan's head had popped out!
She was born at 4:49am weighing 7lb 11oz
She's now 12lb and is beautiful! I'll have piccies on here asap xx
October 21 10 Kids & On Benefits! I am DISGUSTED!Now you all know I like a good moan, but I was absolutely furious when I read this! These people need reporting, there's no way he can't work!! Bloody a**ehole!'The credit crunch is great for us!'Monday 13 October 2008
While hard-working families across the country are struggling to cope in the current economic climate, one family is profiting from it. And infuriatingly, their lifestyle is totally funded by the taxpayer. Tracey and Harry Crompton and their 10 children live for free in a massive seven-bedroom home (two semi-detached houses knocked through). And they boast that since the credit crunch has forced down prices of many non-essential items, they have even more cash to spend on treats. The family get a whopping £32,656 a year in benefits, which they use in part for their utility bills. And while the majority of parents are already dreading finding extra money for Christmas, the jobless couple proudly show off £3,000 worth of presents they bought and wrapped weeks ago. “We’re not stupid enough to wait until the last minute to buy our Christmas presents,” boasts Tracey, 40, from Hull. “The shops put the prices up a month before Christmas Day so we get in early. The credit crunch has meant the prices have dropped even further on luxury things like electrical goods, so we’ve been able to buy loads more than usual. “I’m not satisfied with the benefits we get – I want more. I haven’t been able to work because I’ve had to bring up the kids and Harry’s got health problems.” Despite their parents’ unemployment, Michael, 20, Robin, 19, Matthew, 17, Sarah, 16, Samantha, 14, Harry Andrew, 12, Alex, 11, Kristian, nine, Jesse Lee, seven, and Joshua, six, will each unwrap a £100 Nintendo DS games console, as well as several other goodies. The eldest will get £100 in cash too. “We like to splash out at Christmas and so far we’ve spent around £3,000 on it,” smiles Tracey. “We’ll probably spend more too.” As they don’t work, the couple have plenty of time on their hands, so much of it is spent growing their own vegetables and tending to their chickens and geese (one of which will be Christmas dinner) in their 270ft-long garden. They even make their own wine. “I’m a dab hand at it now,” says 50-year-old Harry, who has been out of work for 15 years. He cites angina and irritable bowel syndrome as the reason, even though he admits to spending hours tending the family’s vegetable patch. “I make red and white wine from grapes grown in the garden. The best by far is my elderflower wine,” he says. Much of the family’s benefits goes on luxury gadgets and toys. They have a PC, a laptop, numerous games consoles, including two PlayStations and two Xboxes, a DVD player, a video recorder, three TVs, a hi-fi music player, and their vast garden is equipped with a slide and 15ft trampoline. Each child also carries around their own high-tech mobile phone so their parents can contact them at any time. “I rarely go without things either. If I need something, like a new pair of shoes, then I’ll get it. I don’t have a dishwasher though, Harry is my dishwasher!” Shockingly, the freeloading family seem unaware that the rest of the country is struggling financially. Tracey proudly says: “We don’t have money worries. We don’t go without things and I think that’s because we are self-sufficient. We grow our own food. I don’t see why others should have money worries. We keep 25 chickens, for eggs and meat, and grow potatoes and loads of vegetables. We make our own biscuits and cakes too.” Despite their “Good Life” lifestyle, the family still spend £250 a week at the supermarket buying 50 bags of crisps, five family packs of chocolate biscuits and 10 litres of fizzy drinks, among other things. Each night, Tracey, who has been married to Harry for 22 years, will cook dinners such as spaghetti Bolognese, spinach carbonara or chicken curry. She spends up to two hours making it and then serves the food in two sittings. The family’s £120-a-week rent is covered by housing benefit and they rake in £628 a week in benefits, including income support, disability allowance, carer’s allowance and non-working family tax credits. A working parent would have to earn £46,500 a year before tax and National Insurance to bring home the same amount. But the only wage earner in the house is oldest son Michael, 20, who contributes £15 a week from his £13k factory job. Matthew, 17, is training to be a chef and Robin is currently unemployed. Surprisingly, the family seem bemused by the reaction they get from the local community, who shout abuse at them. “Every time I walk down the street, people shout ‘scroungers,’” moans Tracey. Although Tracey has never had a job, she says life’s too short to do housework. Their walls are splattered with dirt and wallpaper is peeling from the weight of the grime. The mantelpiece is strewn with magazines, DVDs, and videos, and the floor has been bare since the carpet was pulled up and thrown away after a flood two years ago. “I don’t have much time for cleaning since I started a college course in catering,” she says. “But I only go two mornings a week – any more and they’d stop my benefits because they’d classify me as in education. "I’m really nervous about what will happen at the end of my course. I’ve never worked and so it would be scary to think I would have to get a job. It would have to be a very well--paid job to pay more than the benefits.” By Lisa Woollard (taken from Closer 18-24 Oct, 2008) October 13 New Stuff!Hi all,
I haven't uploaded any pictures in ages, so I thought I'd do you a small slideshow. Unfortunately, there isn't as many as there should be as Marv f****d the PC and needs to try and restore 1000+ jpeg files, all mine of course! (I'm not best pleased about this!)
There is also a short 1 minute video of Rhys with the giggles, and a short surprise for you at the end!!! May I just say that Rhys does find it hilarious, so don't panic!
Have a good week!
xxx
October 08 What Goes Around Comes Around...Hi guys,
Hope you are all well, and Jill if you're reading this, I hope you had a better day!
First of all, thanks everyone for the comments about the text messages, I knew that I hadn't actually done anything, but when you get spoken to like that then it does make you wonder, do you know what I mean?
Well, I haven't heard from said brother since Saturday, I have just left him to get on with things; until he realises what a twat he's been. In my family, it's an awful lot easier to wait til they get their flea out of their ear as it were than to try and get an apology. And I know there won't be one as he's not 'that sort of person' wether he's right or wrong. Must be in the genetical make up cos we're all as stubborn as one another like that!
I've had a good week so far, despite feeling queasy all the time, to be expected I suppose. Today was a good day for me, so I ventured out to get Rhys weighed and boy was I shocked! He tipped the scales at 22lbs 4oz!!! With regards to the average weight of a 5 month old boy, he's over 5lb heavier!!! After I had him weighed , I spent some of the day with my mum. I don't get down to hers too much now I'm not feeling as well as I had. I got back home just before the kids finished school. On my way in the back door, I heard sirens, and naturally, I looked to see where they were headed. They were headed to my brother, the one who's been nasty. I got the kids to be nosey as the last time there was an ambulance there, it was for my niece as she'd cracked her mouth. It turns out that my brother had yet again, got the wrong end of the stick about something and took it out on a wall or something and now needs to be seen at A&E. No offence, but I have always said, what goes around, comes around. I do hope he's ok, but hopefully this will teach him to stop being a temperamental idiot. Not only that, I recall his girlfriend saying if he damaged one more thing in the house through his temper tantrums, then he'd be out on his ear. I don't know if it will happen, but if she does go through with it, then I wouldn't at all be surprised.
Well speak to you all again in a few days or so.
Trina
xxx October 04 Was Havin A Good day Until...Hi all
I am about to go on a bit of a rant, so be warned!
The past week I have been full of ups and downs, Ups and down from the loo with the morning noon and night sickness that is! I've really been suffering with this pregnancy and I still am none the wiser as to how far pregnant I am! I saw the midwife and she said she's gonna put it as roughly 7-9 weeks, but I'm not sure.
Rhys started teething last Friday and on the 1st October, it cut through! Less that a week, I'm impressed! He's now got more on the go, but he's not been too bad with it, just every now and again he's had a screamig fit! Then I feel like it's never going to end!
Today was a good day. Rhys and me laid in til 8:30, which is a fist since he was 3 months! He enjoys playing now so it was nice just to lay in bed and snooze together. We got up, Alex had his breakfast and was out of the door playing with his mates a barely just gone 9! So apart from Rhys, I had an empty house. Sophie stayed at a friends and Marv was at work. While Rhys was sleeping, I made the most of the peace.
Then I got a text from one of my brothers, which has resulted in a huge argument over I don't know what. It's easier to show you the messages, so here goes:
Him : Can me n 4eyez pop down 4 a cuppa
Me : Yh if you're quiet, I have a bit of a headache, get the washing in it's rainin
Him : That rude I wont bovva
Me : What's rude, I just said you need to get your washing in
Him : F*** off im quiet u mek out lyk my youth are bad they just generaly happy which cum with noize, u carnt go on lyk that wiv a 4th on rout I wont hinder your silence no more
(By the way, I hope you can decipher this, I am typing word for word. It took me ages and at this point I STILL can't work out how I have offended him)
Me : Why are you bein stupid, I didn't say that to be nasty, you take things the wrong way
Him : No c i kno you speak ur mind and u can't hold your tongue, it shud be cut from ur mouth u offend me thru my children often, dnt lyk it actually
Me : I wasn't trying to offend you, I don't know what your problem is, I only said I had a headache and now you're going on like an idiot
Him : Comin from an idiot who didnt tek gcse
(May have taken his GCSEs, but who's more grammatically correct with the correct spelling here)
Me : Why are you being like this, I just said I had a headache, anyone would think I just tipped a drink over you or something, tell me how saying I have a headache is offensive
Him : Errm b quiet u say that lyk im a kid, u always bring negativity toward my children and your own 4 that matter. Ur kidz r bad coz dey r neglected, don't actlyk mine r. u ask any1 theyd agree with me, u r the same wiv evry1
(At this point, I am now in tears, I'm apparently neglecting my kids and as far as he's concerned, everyone he knows say the same.)
Me : You have completely taken what I said the wrong way. And how dare you say my kids are neglected. If you feel they are that badly treated then call Social Services
Him : I dont fink u need that again
Now, firstly can some one PLEASE tell me what I have said to get a reaction like this?! Now I could go on about how he's always screaming and shouting at his kids, goin off the deep end over daft things and ignoring serious things, always hitting them on the back of the head and grabbing them when they are being naughty but I hadn't. I could go on about how he's always weeded up and sniffin at the weekend, but I hadn't.
Now I have said in the past that i don't like the way his kids touch things of mine, like my PC, my £1,200 telly and other stuff most kids know not to touch, but for some reason, they think they are allowed to touch all this stuff at home. I only tell them not to touch stuff because a) It's not theirs, b) They can't afford to replace it and c) these kids should know better, one of them is in school! These are the sort of kids who come round your house and purposely watch you to see if you are going to say something, they've broken loads fo things and Marvin has freaked out cos they have never offered to replace or pay for it. Up til now I have defended them to the hills saying, they're family, what am I suppsed to do? But that's it now. I am not going to bother any more. All my other nieces and nephew that come over know they shouldn't touch particular things, their parents are happy for me to say know when their child goes to throw a brush at an LCD screen,but not this one. He thinks he's the golden f*****g child, he always has doen.
I even phoned my mum to see what she thought and all she could say was, 'I'm not getting involved.' Well THANX
OK, rant over!
Speak soon guys,
Trina xxx September 24 Didn't I Talk About This Last Year????!!! ;oPHi guys,
First and foremost, massive apologies for not being about - again! This time it was the monitor, it died a death! So at the moment, we are borrowing a cruddy old monitor but hey, I'm back online!
So just to let you all know.....
I AM EXPECTING!!!! AGAIN!
It looks like I am around 6 weeks pregnant, so I need you all to keep your fingers and toes crossed that things are ok. I have a midwife appointment tomorrow, so she'll be able to arrange a date for a scan. I'll let you all know how I get on! August 22 Bunch of W*****s! I am so glad I'm not the only one....I have just been onto a friends blog and read about their problems with Working Tax Credit.
Well I have another saga to tell about this so-called benefit.
Last year my patrner recieved Incapacity Benefit due to ill health and eventually returned to work again in March this year. it came to the renewal form, which we did and we also added on there that we'd had our third child. They were sent the forms back via recorded delivery as I have no faith in the mail service (that's another saga!) So I presume everything is dealt with and that's the end of it.
Last Thursday, I recieved a letter saying that as we had not done our renewal, they would be cancelling our payments of £136/week starting from last Friday. So I immediately called them, explaining that way back in May, I had sent off their forms, quoting the recorded delivery number and they STILL would not accept that we had contacted them. However, they said they would reinstate our claim, stating if I didn't give them the information that I alredy had then they would be cancelling it in January 09. I asked them if there would be a payment on the Friday and I was assured that this would be the case.
So Friday came along and SHOCK HORROR, no money! So I called them back again to find out what was going on at which point I was told by 'Mke' that if continued to be abusive he would terminate the call. (I had simply stated that I was peed off. Not p*ss*ed off, but peed off with the way I was being treated.) He then said that it would take up to a week for me to recieve any money. So I asked him how he expexcted me to get baby formula and nappies on thin air to which he said and I quote, "That is not my problem madam, that is yours, if you have difficulty in providing for your children then I suggest you contact child services" You can imagine the disgust I had by this point. Still, I said ok, I will wait for the next Friday.
So I called them up again on Tuesday to find out any progress and spoke to a much more polite person, who never actually agreed this was their fault and because it apparently is my fault for not doing the forms in time, (WTF!!!???))) I could be waiting up to FOUR WEEKS!!!!!!!!!!! So yet again, I explained the Recorded Delivery situation and she said they have no record of recieving any recorded Delivery items from me and there wasn't a lot I could do about it but wait. So again, I explained that I have 3 kids, one of which is a 3 month old baby that needs formula and nappies, let alone food for the other 2 and she said there still was nothing I coud do because according to their records, they hadn't recieved anything and it wasn't even being handled in the office she was in anymore!
I have lessened my faith in the British government has been waining for months now and this saga has done absolutely nothing to help me restore that faith. What with the joke that is the CSA (Child Support Agency) and now this, it's no wonder people end up committing crime in order just to live. Mav, if you're reading this, I am at a loss as to what to do next.
I have no idea how long I have left with the internet as the way we work our money out, all the phone bills come out during the month which would have usually been covered by the £100 odd that I now haven't got. Not only that, I don't know how Marv is supposed to get to work without petrol as we live over 20 miles away from his work.
Even my own family ar not helping out as I thought they would do, my mum can't and other than my sister giving me a milk token and some of those veggie vouchers, I have had very little help. However, I have been very shocked and pleased with a few of my friends on Faebook though. I wont name names, but I jaut want to thank you for your very generous offers you have given me, I am ever grateful to you for your help.
I just hope that my money DOES get sorted soon as we now have £5.79 until the last day of August as our Child Benefit gets pai in monthly.
Have a good weekend my friends
xxx August 11 WOW, What A Week!!!!!!!!!!!Hi guys!!!!!!!!!!!! I have had a fantastic week last week!!!!! Well it actually didn't start until Thursday morning. It's a long story, but I shall be as brief as I can! OK, some of you may know that I have 5 siblings. I have an older brother that I haven't seen or heard from in over 10 years, and in an earlier blog on my old page I had put it out there that I was searching for him. The last time I had seen him was shortly after I had Sophie waaaay back in March 1998, he'd come to see me in my new house later in the May. Well, I checked my emails on Thursday morning as I usually do, and I had a message from slide.com, the place where I have my photo guest-book which is on the greeting of this guest-book. I also have the same guest-book on bebo, myspace and other sites that I go on. Anyway, it said someone had signed. I clicked onto slide and would you believe it, it was my brother!!!!!!!!!! Then I thought, how the hell am I supposed to actually talk to him? So I had to reply to his one onto mine, hoping that he'd see it and thankfully he had.
I had a great day! I'll be blogging again tomorrow, so see you guys soon! Oh, by the way, you'll be able to see more pictures in the latest album! August 05 Summer Holidays Draaaaaaaag...................!Hiya, Ok, I am trying to get back on top of this blogging malarkey, it's just been sooooooo long since I did it! LOL Weymouth Sealife Centre 1st August 2008 Well last Friday, we all went to Weymouth Sealife Centre for the day. Well I say the day, but we were back home again by mid afternoon because I was really rough with a stinking cold. Looks like everyone else has got it now! Anyway,we went to see the sea creatures. It wasn't as expensive as I first thought, considering what the place has to offer. They have recently introduced 4 kiddie rides there and they are free and unlimited use, so that was good. I never thought that Rhys would enjoy it as much as he did though! A lot of the sections were quite dark, but when we went to see the turtle tunnel (you basically walk under their tank) he was fascinated! He didn't know where to look first, bless him. Then the other good bit for him was when we saw the seal sanctuary. They have a section of their enclosure 'under' water so you could see them swimming and diving past! Because a lot of the areas were non-flash photography, the pictures I took weren't fantastic, but I uploaded all the pictures of the day anyway! Apart from a few niggles, Sophie and Alex really enjoyed themselves. I think Sophie enjoyed the penguin sanctuary the best, they are her favourite creatures at the moment. And Alex loved the shark nursery the best. Me, well I loved the fact that we got to spend a day out as a family with no worries. The weather was fantastic and even the food in the restaurant wasn't too bad!
Since last Friday, I have been fighting to get over a nasty cold that seems to have been lingering on for weeks! Poor Rhys has it today, and along with him teething, he's feeling very sorry for himself! I bought him this cool 3-in-1 baby walker thing off ebay and you can also use it as a rocker too! Sophie and Alex have near on driven me mad already and we're only on the second week of the holidays, goodness knows what sort of wreck I'll be by September! Marv's still enjoying his job, despite a few nasty roadside accidents that have had fatalities. He hasn't said a lot about what he's seen, but it has changed the way he drives now. Well I will try to get back on again in a few days or so. And my apologies to all of you who haven't seen me visit for a while, it's tough to type at the same time as holding a baby you know! July 25 Me and Us!Evening all!!
I have put in loads of PHOTOS!!!! so feel free to have a looksie!
How have you all been?
I feel well out of the loop, I never realised how long I'd been away for so long.
Well Rhys is now a whole 13 weeks, I can not believ how quickly time has flown by! Loads has happened since I last blogged, I just hope I can remember it all!
Sophie has started the teenage hormone stresy thing and OH MY WORD she is driving me crazy! It's all tears and tantrums with her at the moment!
Alex won his races in Sports Day, and I am so proud of him because as some of you may already know, he has difficulties mixing with other kids cos he has mild Aspergers and ADHD. He made me feel so proud! He's off to Junior school in September, and I am very grateful to the school as they are giving Alex visits once a fortnight over the 6 week break to try and get him used to the school! I was a wreck at his leavers assembly cos he'd behaved well enough to stand up and read a poem he had written with 4 other class mates:
The Wonderful Poem
One river splashing,
Two mangoes falling,
Three trees waving,
Four coconuts dropping,
Five grassy hills standing,
Six huts for living,
Seven people carrying,
Eight jolly people walking,
Nine palm tree leaves growing,
Ten tasty exotic fruits for people buying,
Eleven t-shirts for wearing,
Twelve people smiling.
by Tia, Jazmine, Ashleigh, Lucy & Alex!
How cute was that poem?!?!
And then there's little Rhys! Or not so little! I never imagined how well a baby could get on, even if I do say so myself! Up until Wednesday just gone, he's put on a massive amount of weight! Bearin in mind that Alex was 14lb 7oz at 13 weeks, Rhys was weighed on Wednesday and he weighed 17lb 12oz!!!! But he isn't fat as such, he just looks more in proprtion with a 6-9 month old! Sophie never weighed that until she was over a year old!
I also must say that unfortunately I had to stop breastfeeding as it was taking up most of my days and nights and I wasn't getting any sleep. But he took to the bottle VERY easily. He is feeding on 7oz of Aptimil 2, SIX bottles a day! He also has a dummy, which I know not everyone agrees with, but the latest studies show that it may significantly reduce cot death. So I am going to go along with it. That and it means I get sleep! Oh speaking of sleep, he goes through from 8pm to 6am with a 'dream feed' at around 11pm.
As for me and Marv, we're both good. Marv is still with the vehicle recovery company and still enjoying his job. He has become the best dad I could ever have ased for and every day he still thanks me for giving him a wonderful family. He has now decided to try and re-bond with his own family as a result of having Rhys!
Me?
Well I am still the grumpy, moaning, stroppy old moo that I was the last time I was on here on a regular basis! However, I still am anti-depressant free, and enjoyimg life!
Well speak soon, I'll be back again next week! xxx July 23 I'm back everyone!Hiya all,
Just a quickie to let you know that I am FINALLY back onlie, WOOHOOOOOO!!!!!!!
So you can start sending me comments again, yay!
I am gonna do a proper blog later on!
tata for now, Trina x x x July 13 hey guys!! just a Quick note to let you all know that i STILL ain't on the internet properly! if you wanna chat, i'm on facebook or you can email me on snow-white1980@blackberry.orange.co.uk rhys is well over a stone now, he was 11 weeks yesterday! hope to hear from you all soon! trina x x May 23 Rhys is a Month Old!!!Hiya!
Still got no net, but hey, I get to use me mum's for free!
So Rhys is a month old already! He was weighed on Wednesday and he weighed 11lbs 11oz! So at least I know my body is producing enough milk. He has been sleeping pretty well, apart from one night, when he decided to stay awake ALL night! Other than that, he's doing well. We have had to put him in the big cot already as he has outcrown the Moses basket and he started properly smiling on Thursday! For some reason, I can't upload any pics onto here,but if tou're on myspace you can find me on there: MYSPACE I may have to add you first but that's not a problem.
I'm also on bebo and Facebook!
Well have a great weekend and I'll update you when I can! May 16 Just a Quickie.....Hiya all
Just to let you all know, I'm having to share te net with me ma at the mo, slight matter of no money to pay the bill!!!
Well little Rhys got wieghed on Wednesday and he was 10lb 14oz!!! He's feeding well, and has settled into a great routine, which means I get sleep!! I haven't gone back on to my happy pills yet, as I feel good. Having said that, I do have the nutty nurse coming out to see me every Friday to make sure I'm not slipping back into the depression.
The only downer I have really had since Rhys was born was last week when I went into Primark to get me clothes and nowt fitted me. So I threw a proper kiddie tantrum and cried like a four year old!
Marv is really enjoying his role as Daddy and the kids are loving being a big brother/sister. They have even been helping!
Well I have to go for now a Im being summoned for food!
Speak soon and there'll be new pics on very soon! May 05 Baby Rhys Video!Hi again,
I just thought you may want to se Rhys's first evening at home, already wide awake, observing the new world around him!
How Quickly a Week Flies By......Hi guys! So a week has passed very quickly with my life completely changed! And I am loving it!!! Click here for pictures of our first week!
I'll let you know how it all happened (minus the gory parts of course!!) now that I have sufficiently recovered enough to recount the event! (It's drawn out, but I have the urge to ramble!) On Friday 25th April, I was booked in to be induced, so I got the kids up early as they would be going to my friends whilst I had the baby. So Marv and I arrived at the antenatal ward to be told that I wouldn't actually be getting started until after lunch time. So we thought, not so bad, Marv can pop out and do the bits we had forgotten, like getting in some food, loo roll etc. So 2pm rolls by and so far there was no sign of me being transferred to the labour ward any time soon. In fact, other than the tea lady (who didn't speak any English so couldn't understand when I said I wanted a strong tea and got gnat's piss instead) I hadn't seen any body other than when they were passing by the ward. I didn't even have any other patients in the ward with me, so when Marv wasn't there I was so bored. Around teatime, we were finally seen by a very apologetic doctor explaining that we hadn't been started off yet as the labour ward was full to bursting and they were waiting for a free room. They said they would probably be fitting me in late evening time so I sent Marv home to chill. About 8pm, I got the bad news that nothing would be happening as there still wasn't any room for me, at which point I got really upset.I thought they were going to send me home or something. But they also said that I'd be definitely be getting induced between 5 and 6am and to have some sleep. At least I knew what was happening - finally. I called Marv to let him know he'd need to be up and about early and I finally relaxed a bit. About 5:30 in the morning, I was woken by the midwife who told me to get my stuff together as I was finally being transferred to the delivery suite. So I got my stuff and followed the midwife to the room I'd be spending the next goodness knows how long in. I chuckled to myself because 2 years earlier I was in the same room when my sister gave birth to her first born! I called Marv, (who was still asleep) and he said he'd be on his way. I had my waters broken at some point between 6 and half past, then I was put on the baby monitor for a while to see if anything was beginning to happen. At this point, he was still really high up and it felt like it was going to be a long day. After about half an hour, I was allowed to go and have a walk, so I walked about in the grounds of the hospital, to wait for Marv. We met up, carried on walking about for a while and I could finally begin to feel something happen. About 9am, they made me stay in the room, as I had to have constant monitoring, so I asked for a gym ball to sit on as they are well comfy. I continued to feel the pains coming stronger and more regular, but I was still quite chatty and having a laugh with Marv. By this point, I still had no pain relief! 10:30 came along, and the midwife decided that things weren't going as quickly as they wanted, so they hooked me up to this drip that makes things move along quicker. I'm not sure what it was, but it worked! I could feel the pains more intensely by now and I knew that it wouldn't be too long before there was a baby. I was still being stubborn though and said I didn't need pain relief just yet. But i knew it wouldn't be long because I was finding things were beginning to aggravate me. By 11:30, I asked to be helped onto the bed and asked for the gas & air. They gave it to me with this stupid mouth piece, so I begged them to find a full face mask. They spent 10 minutes looking for one as apparently they aren't used very often anymore. By this time, I think Marv stopped making jokes because he knew I was getting stressed. I don't really remember anything after that until about 12:30, when I could hear a buzzer and told the midwife to 'sort the f*****g buzzer out'! I then got told it was for me! I became alert by this point, and it turned out that although I had made good progress, because I was so tired from the lack of sleep from the past 48 hours of waiting, they were going to help me along with a ventouse. Within the next 10 minutes, I had started pushing, and with the added assistance, Rhys literally popped out after 5 minutes of pushing!!! Without the nasty details, they said it was like the champagne ceremony after a Grand Prix win! Any way, they put Rhys on me, and Marv very tearfully cut the cord! Once they had wrapped him up for me, Marv got to hold him. both the kids came up straight away and they were really happy.
I came home the following afternoon. The past week I have found out that I somehow have damaged my coccyx, so I have this stupid doughnut pillow. But on the upside, Rhys and I have both settled into a good feeding routing, and yes I am feeding him natures way, as number one, it's better, two, easier and three cheaper. We don't qualify for milk tokens so there really was no other option. The kids have cooed over him all week and Marv has exceeded his parental ways. I'm so proud of my new family! Birth in Brief:
So we will keep you posted over the next few months, but in the meantime, thanks to all of you who have followed my pregnancy diary and all the fantastic support you gave me when I was feeling crappy! |
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